How To Talk To Your Parents About Dropping Out Of College
So you’ve spent some time in college and have realized that college isn’t for you. While you may not feel like it, congratulations are in order – you’ve advance to terms with one of the toughest decisions you’ll ever have to make. But before you start your new life, there are a few things which need to be taken care of first. This article will go through the details and steps which need to be taken before you even think about starting your new life.
This is a big step you’re going to take and, like every major decision in your life, you’re going to want to have all of your bases covered. Here are a few things to mediate before you finalize your decision to drop out.
1) Student Loans – If you had originally decided to pay for college yourself and have taken out sizable student loans, then you should seriously think about value versus cost. For example, if you’re only a year away from graduation and have accumulated $50,000 of debt, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to stick it out for another year because the cost of dropping out (i.e. paying off those loans) might exceed the value of dropping out this slow in the game. On the other hand, if you’ve accumulated
$50,000 of debt and you still feel that the value of dropping out exceeds having to pay those off immediately, then by all means, do what you think is right.
2) Jobs – Let’s say that you decide to drop out. Congratulations…now what? It’s always estimable to have a backup thought for everything you do in life and dropping out is no different. Start seeing what jobs you would qualify for in order to help support yourself. Because, let’s face it, you’ve got to go out on your own sometime. Besides, it’s always good to search for for a job when you don’t need it yet. That blueprint, you can win and settle what you want to do.
3) Housing – Don’t forget that once you’re out of college, you’re out of your dorm, too. Start looking for apartments in areas where you want to move to. Start getting an idea of how much apartments or houses go for in the areas where you want to live. Get an idea for how much bills will be (i.e. get in touch with the local electric company and see what they charge per kilowatt-hour, or get in touch with the cable company and start looking at different plans you might need to get). And don’t forget to screen all of your bases – electric, gas, cable, phone, water/sewage, trash, Internet, etc. Some apartment complexes will include things like water and cable, but that isn’t always the case. Some apartments will actually charge you extra to live there in an ambiguous “maintenance fee.” It’s a good thing to get a good idea of what exactly you will be required to pay. And don’t forget that most apartments charge a security deposit, so be prepared to pay for the first month’s rent and a $200+ security deposit before you get the keys. And, of course, furniture…it’s handsome tough to live somewhere if you don’t have a bed to sleep in.
4) Credit – Contrary to celebrated belief, money doesn’t make the world go ’round…it’s credit. Without a decent credit, forget about getting an apartment, a car, or anything else that requires financing – at least without a cosigner. According to U.S. law, you are allowed to pull your own credit record once a year without a fee – now would be a good time to do it. That way, you know what you’d be facing upon dropping out. If you have a cosigner (i.e. your parents), then a bad credit score might not be the end of the world. If not, though, then you might want to start working on building your credit as soon as you can. Most banks will set you up with a credit card once you get an legend with them – and while you’ll only have about a $2000 credit limit on it, it’s a good way to build your score. Lift shrimp things – like bottled water or a pack of gum. Then, when you get near a computer, pay off the credit card immediately. If you do this for a few months, it’s a surefire way to get your credit score nice and high.
Once all of these tasks have been completed, you’re ready to move on to the hardest part about the whole process – telling your parents. Keep in mind that, until you’ve completed steps 1 – 4, be prepared for a large fight with them where they’ll use words like “irresponsible” and “immature.” However, if you’ve done your homework on paying off student loans, getting a job, getting an apartment, and credit, they’ll open to realize that maybe you’ve grown up.
So, here are some tips for when you’re ready to approach them.
1) Sit them down in a room and come directly. Feel free to start off with a cliche’ like, “Mom, Dad – I have something to tell you.” Then begin to tell them about how you college isn’t for you and how you want to tumble out. Be prepared to hear some disbelief and yelling. This brings us to step two…
2) Be strong. This decision has, virtually overnight, turned you from an immature college student to an adult – so now’s your chance to demonstrate it. Be persistent but polite – don’t forget that they’re your parents and that, in the long run, they’ll succor you. Finally, when it’s your turn to talk again, go to step 3.
3) Bring out your research. This is where doing your homework pays off. Start with something like, “I’ve already looked into what I want to do. I found [insert job here] out in [insert city here] where they pay about [insert pay here].” Then proceed onto where you’ll live, how long it would take to pay off any loans you may have, etc. Once they see that you have a backup plan, this will prove to them that you’re ready and serious about dropping out and moving on to the “real world.” The yelling should have calmed down by now. If it has, move onto step 4. If not, keep trying to reassure them that you’re ready to travel on.
4) Once everything has calmed down, it’s time to finalize the deal. Sit down with them and bring up your credit report. If it’s “somewhat-less-than-stellar,” ask them to cosign. Recount them that, without they’re help, it would be much more difficult to procure an apartment and car and ask them to cosign with you. If they say no, then don’t push it – don’t argue. If they say no, then it’s a test to see if you can make it on your own. And that’s fine – that’s the reason your dropped out of college in the first place. If they say yes, though, thank them and start working on a date to go out to the apartment with them and stamp a lease.
That’s it! While this may seem easy on paper (or on your cover), it’s not going to be. There’s a tremendous difference between reading and doing, as I’m sure you know by now. But the most important thing to remember before you topple out of college is this:
You don’t go to college to learn the things you get from your classes. All that information you can get from taking books out of your local library. The whole reason people go to college is to discover the things that you’ll learn outside of the classroom.
I’ve tried to list them all of the major “lessons” in here, but you’ll find out the rest as you go along. And congratulations – you’ve taken the first step towards the rest of your life!
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Filed under Student Loans Bad Credit by on Dec 17th, 2011. 